«Oh.» [Okay, yeah, that was. Obvious, wasn’t it...] «So how come your number comes second and theirs come first?» [He can’t profess to understand the logic there, and there should probably be at least some since they’re androids, right?
Right???]
«Your model name rolls off the tongue more. It’s kinda nice. A2...aytoo, aytooooo...»
[...he may or may not be sounding it aloud at the same time.]
«But shouldn’t prototypes be named similarly to later versions? At least, that’s what I thought was how it usually worked.» [Why change a naming convention at all for any project? That’s just asking for confusion. Hell, he doesn’t even have to try hard to imagine the fit Howard would’ve had if such an idea had been forced on him, even if by the US government. “You don’t mess with perfection,” he’d probably say.
Which Bucky realizes likely doesn’t matter to A2 as she’s the product and not the one who created and must keep track of what all has been created, but...]
«It’s what I have to call you though, designation or not. It’s basically your name. Unless you have a secret, personal name you’re not telling me about.»
They just needed our data. We weren't meant to be used again.
[ better to keep something buried if you changed the naming system entirely. not that she would really know what goes on in the developmental process. ]
No. [ what's in a name, anyway? pascal, eve, adam. anemone. they all assigned themselves those names, and there's significance behind it. those names must hold some meaning. her old squadron called her no. 2, but that was when she was still a part of yorha. ] No point in giving something a name when it's just gonna be scrapped in the end.
«Why? You still have to call it by something, don’t you? You can’t just go “that one prototype” all the time. That’d make no sense and be just as confusing.»
«Besides, you still exist. That’s enough reason to call you by a name.»
[There’s a bit of a pause before he continues. Not long enough that he’s waiting for her to reply, but long enough for him to settle on a decision.]
she stops walking, footsteps stilling as she processes it: his words, the feeling beneath the guilt and the regret and the loneliness. does she really exist? had she really been living these past few years? all she was doing was go through the motions, the endless fighting and killing, all in the name of vengeance under the guise, the desire to forget--
"you and i must never forget." "i know."
how much longer will she continue holding on?
"i hope that you can start over, here. i hope that you can find peace." ]
[ she doesn't know what tootsie even is, but whatever. the cut off is strange, though; he sounded like he had more to say. there's confusion on her end of the connection, a brief flicker-flash of concern. ]
[After a few moments, an image flickers into her thoughts. It’s chased by a wave of amusement.]
«Geezus, look at this death trap! I coulda died!» [Some shock still lingers in his tone despite the hilarity he finds in the situation. Nothing too seriously though. He heals pretty quickly.] «God. Sometimes I forget even though I can walk fairly silently, I’m not a dainty leaf... Glad I wasn't still jogging.»
[ a little more urgently this time. also, she is going to find him now, which admittedly doesn't take her very long at all. she might not have the visor like 9S and 2B, but she can still detect his position. ]
She’ll find him squatting near some bushes, peeking under carefully. He’s trying to be as silent as possible, but that might not...come across since he’s by himself anyway.]
[Yeah, thank God for that, right? Now she won’t be able to suffer her morning in peace. What a real darn shame.
Given the general silence around him and the way he seems to be listening carefully for...something, he does end up hearing her approach, though he doesn't turn to check.]
[ she steps closer, hardly making a sound as she crouches next to him. ]
It can't be far from its parents. [ it's a shame she doesn't have 2B's animal befriending abilities, and her lack in animal interaction doesn't really help. sure, she rode boars around a lot, but she had access to feed and they weren't exactly small. ] I don't have anything to lure it out with.
[He pauses, thinks a few moments before responding. There's nothing to track in the immediate vicinity, and the Soldier doesn't take that lightly.]
«I haven’t passed any, heard any. Didn’t see any adults up to the horizon all around, even ignoring all the trees. Maybe they came through here before, but it wasn’t recently. It can’t have been.»
[There’s another pause as he considers what’d work best for a lure. Obviously his hands would be far too intrusive and foreign to the little piglet to be anything by terrifying. So if a lure is what’s needed, then...]
«There are some of those berry bushes. That they like eating from. To the. Shit. South?» [He sends a brief flicker of an image, the path he means from where they are, grimacing slightly at the side effects.] «If you could get some for me, I’d be real grateful.»
[ quit doing that. she knows the bushes he's talking about, having seen them a few times while out hunting with the others, and leaves to find them without another word.
a few minutes later, there's another image sent over: a handful of berries cupped in her palm, metal and wiring peeking out from a few scratches on her arm. ]
it takes less time for her to return to him, kicking up a minor breeze before slowing her steps again and crouching next to him. a few berries are placed just outside of the bush's shade in hopes of luring the piglet out.
there's silence for a moment and then the shuffling returns, a brief glimpse of a tiny snout peeking out from beneath the bush. ]
[At the sight of the tiny snout, his face lights up, eyes widening as a broad grin spreads across his face. He gives the tiny boar a few moments to snuffle at the food before he very, very carefully lowers his right hand, palm up, to the ground.]
Hey there, little guy. [Quietly, just above a whisper.] You hungry there, pal?
[ A2 watches as he offers the piglet his hand, how it sniffs at his fingers and then at the berries, finally poking the rest of its head out from beneath. she folds her arms over her knees, resting her chin on them as she watches the way bucky's smile widens, how it finally reaches his eyes. ]
Looks like you made a friend.
[ it's said just as quietly, something in her expression softening. meanwhile, the boar has finished the berries, nudging bucky's hand with its snout as if to look for more. ]
[A warmth dances through his veins, a sigh of comfort as he watches the little boar takes the prize. He can feel its breath against his skin, tickling gently alongside the piglet’s lips and tongue. He can’t help the pleased chuckle.]
We’ve made one, Ada. You helped too.
[As the boar grow more curious, berries devoured, he gently curves his hand around to lightly pet the side of its neck, trying to maintain a sense of concern without frightening the little creature away.]
[ he's the one who found the piglet in the first place, after all. it still seems hungry so she places the rest of the berries in front of it, movements slow and careful. it's strange to be so close to something so small and fragile; the animals back on her earth were easily twice her size, it's still jarring to see one so young.
its pulse is steady and it seems to be warming up to bucky fairly quickly, having not moved since bucky started petting it. ]
Dunno. I’m sure his ma’s probably worried about him being gone. Don’t think I could bring myself to. [His hand shifts, slipping further around and smoothing across the small boar’s back. It seems content enough to stay as it is for now, soaking in the attention and affection.]
You did plenty though. If I’d gone to get the berries, he would’ve run, no doubt. Probably gotten even more lost. This way, we can bring him back, see?
Yeah... Probably not every day he meets a person, right? [The pets shift into a light scrub, akin to that of scratching a puppy. Rather than shift away in dislike, the piglet seems to quite enjoy it, even backing up a fraction to get another part of his back scratched.]
And of course not. [He chuckles, the light reaching his eyes briefly again.] I didn’t want to make you wait on me though. Not when you’d come to find me. [He gives her a brief look then, the light still lingering. A moment passes before he glances back to the pig who’s grown comfortable enough with their presence to settled down on his haunches.]
[ the waiting, she means. she's not exactly in a hurry for much of anything these days, and learning to have patience isn't difficult when you've already lost everything.
but there's something about that light in his eyes, bright as the stars they watched together on her first night on the island and just as warm, that makes her pause. she starts to see a little now why 9S had ended up with jude the way he did.
instead of answering, she lowers a hand to the piglet, letting it take a moment to sniff at it before she lightly strokes down his snout once with a finger. ]
[When she reaches out, he carefully withdraws his hand to allow her the space. And then he watches. There’s always a calm to her movements, a simplicity and elegance that he’s never seen a human quite express. Perhaps something to do with her engineering, her plates and circuitry, but even as the physical constraints dictate the limitations, there’s something else so real—reactive—in the way Ada interacts with the world around her.
It steadies hearts, opens doors.
The graceful stroke of her finger earns a curious snort from the piglet, snuffling and bumping into her hand clumsily as it tries to understand what the single stroke means. Bucky regards the instance, the fumble and curiosity, and feels a sudden fondness for the both of these darling existences interacting in front of him, very real and very alive.]
[ she steadies the piglet as he stumbles against her hand, carefully nudging him back onto his haunches to regain his balance. she can feel his pulse, rabbit quick in his eagerness to explore more, the texture of his hide softer than the coarser ones she'd been used to of the adult boars back on her earth.
but it's that fumble and the curiosity that sparks a flicker of familiarity. she'd seen it before, groups of machine children gathered around pascal and later, even around her, their cries of "big sis" echoing around the forest as they stumbled over their eagerness to play and learn. it feels like it's been ages since then, since she'd deleted pascal's memories of them. but she still remembers, and likely will never forget.
she'd paused in her ministrations and the piglet protests by bumping his snout against her hand again, this time with more purpose. she breathes another amused huff, scratching along his neck instead. ]
[The accusation, familiar and comfortable, pries a short, amused laugh from him. It's not the first time Ada teased him. But the lilt and delivery are so on par with Bucky's usual sense of humor that how much it endeared her to him came at a genuine surprise.]
I have that problem, I guess. Always wanna make sure everyone feels like they’re important. Because they are. [Even you, Ada.]
There are worse traits to have though. Especially when this one gets us such a cute pig for a friend.
[ she shifts to sit on the forest floor next to bucky, long legs splayed in front of her and slightly bent at the knees. the piglet takes the opportunity to make his way between them and she cups his head carefully between her hands.
always wanna make sure everyone feels like they’re important. she wonders who will make sure he feels important too. ]
It's not bad. [ her thumbs run back and forth along the piglet's snout, watching the way it twitches beneath her touch, the way his ears flick to the side. ] Feeling important is a good thing.
[He watches each fraction of movement on Ada’s part, seamless and likely perfect to the nearest micron, if not smaller. She displays it so naturally, likely without even the faintest amount of conscious thought toward her physical construction, even as a prototype. None of it escapes him. He doesn’t know if it’s strange to marvel at it at every instance, but he does it anyway, unable to stop even as adorable as the piglet becomes at the gentle affection Ada gifts it.
(What does she see? What does she feel?)]
Yeah. I think so too. [Idly.
He joins her on the ground, arms crossed as he leans on his arm in their direction, though whether to be nearer to her or the baby boar, he isn’t sure. After a moment's pause he continues,]
Have you ever felt that way before? Like you’re doing something that matters.
[ it's hard not to notice bucky staring, but it doesn't really bother her. she's gotten the same stares since her arrival, in varying degrees of curiosity and unease, and she'd come to accept that. she's different from humans, different from 9S and 2B, even though they were all part of yorha at some point; sometimes she misses it, the feeling of belonging to something. there's nothing left for her to belong to anymore.
she supposes in the end it doesn't really matter. not when she's here, sitting in the forest with bucky, petting a baby boar like it's something they've always done. like it's something normal people do all the time, even if neither of them are normal. ]
... I guess I did. [ doing something that matters. purpose, duty. they're not that different. even if they were expendable, only used for combat data to be implemented in future models, at the very least they had a purpose. ] I knew I was fighting for something.
[While the direct response came with some relief, her description after quickly disperses it, the phrasing concerning and indicative of underlying disagreement. His gaze moves to the boar now, the small piglet snuffling and studying Ada’s hands as they idle.]
[ what did she want? the idea of wanting anything is a foreign concept, one that she had never taken the time to consider. they were made for a specific purpose in mind: to gather data, all to perpetuate the lie that they and future generations were given. but at the time, she had a purpose. at the time, she had believed in what she was fighting for. and maybe she didn't make a difference in the end, maybe all of it was pointless, but she is still here. she is still alive, even though she should have died with the rest of them in that tower. ]
No, [ she says eventually, fingers going back to running over the piglet's head, past his ears and along his back. ] It wasn't. Not that it matters anymore.
[ yorha is gone. they have nothing left to return to. ending up on this world was likely the best alternative they've been given. ]
[It matters, he thinks. It always does. Every little bit that a person can brush off as nothing always ends up as something, and he knows this now, so much time having passed and all the weight of living having built up.
When she asks, he gives a soft huff, ready to answer easily, but
his mind blanks. He isn’t sure what he's supposed to say, even as instantaneously as the gut reaction to answer had come. He tries to wonder why, but instead feels a mind-numbing nothingness, not even sure of if he’s confused himself or if he’s forgotten something. Either way, it doesn’t feel particularly important. Probably just his poor sleep catching up with him.
(Unknown to him, the reality lays hidden from his consciousness, memories seeded deep in his brain of one Steve Rogers that had been his best friend entirely inaccessible to his conscious thought. Were it still within his grasp, it would be what had driven him for many years, but without memory of the importance of Steve, much of his past seems quite meaningless.)
After a moment, he closes his mouth and hums, soft self-reprimand of the oddness his exhaustion seems to have brought on before he shakes his head to reply properly.]
Can’t say that I have. Not beyond what I had to do to get by. I think I was mostly only around to make other people feel that way.
[ she takes a moment to think about it, looking up from the piglet to meet his gaze. ]
... Always want to make sure everyone feels like they’re important, huh.
[ again, she finds herself wondering who will be there to make him feel like he's important. she's certainly seen him doing a lot of that, even in the short amount of time she's known him; he insists she's more than what she is, he gave her a name. it's more than she can say anyone else has done for her.
apparently, piglets aren't exempt from that either. ]
You don't have to. You're not responsible for making people feel that.
[ she wonders if he spends the same amount of time thinking about himself as much as he would for others. she wonders about the difficulties of that, of the burdens he must carry. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
lefthandfree) wrote2017-09-25 08:02 am
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[ the presence of humans is probably more jarring than somehow ending up in another world entirely, but. details. ]
Guess so.
[ it might be too soon to consider them friends, but well. they're all they've got here. yorha or no, they stick together. ]
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Right???]
«Your model name rolls off the tongue more. It’s kinda nice. A2...aytoo, aytooooo...»
[...he may or may not be sounding it aloud at the same time.]
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[ great. he's probably going to give her some weird nickname or something, huh. ]
It's just a designation. Not a big deal.
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Which Bucky realizes likely doesn’t matter to A2 as she’s the product and not the one who created and must keep track of what all has been created, but...]
«It’s what I have to call you though, designation or not. It’s basically your name. Unless you have a secret, personal name you’re not telling me about.»
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[ better to keep something buried if you changed the naming system entirely. not that she would really know what goes on in the developmental process. ]
No. [ what's in a name, anyway? pascal, eve, adam. anemone. they all assigned themselves those names, and there's significance behind it. those names must hold some meaning. her old squadron called her no. 2, but that was when she was still a part of yorha. ] No point in giving something a name when it's just gonna be scrapped in the end.
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«Besides, you still exist. That’s enough reason to call you by a name.»
[There’s a bit of a pause before he continues. Not long enough that he’s waiting for her to reply, but long enough for him to settle on a decision.]
«Ada. How’s that sound to you?»
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she stops walking, footsteps stilling as she processes it: his words, the feeling beneath the guilt and the regret and the loneliness. does she really exist? had she really been living these past few years? all she was doing was go through the motions, the endless fighting and killing, all in the name of vengeance under the guise, the desire to forget--
"you and i must never forget."
"i know."
how much longer will she continue holding on?
"i hope that you can start over, here. i hope that you can find peace." ]
... Sure.
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«Something tells me you won’t be a fan of that tho—»
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[ she doesn't know what tootsie even is, but whatever. the cut off is strange, though; he sounded like he had more to say. there's confusion on her end of the connection, a brief flicker-flash of concern. ]
Hey.
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«Geezus, look at this death trap! I coulda died!» [Some shock still lingers in his tone despite the hilarity he finds in the situation. Nothing too seriously though. He heals pretty quickly.] «God. Sometimes I forget even though I can walk fairly silently, I’m not a dainty leaf... Glad I wasn't still jogging.»
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[ don't broadcast telepathically while walking ok. ]
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[C’mon. Be realistic here.]
«But fine. If you want me to shut up, then I’ll jus—»
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Hey.
[ a little more urgently this time. also, she is going to find him now, which admittedly doesn't take her very long at all. she might not have the visor like 9S and 2B, but she can still detect his position. ]
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She’ll find him squatting near some bushes, peeking under carefully. He’s trying to be as silent as possible, but that might not...come across since he’s by himself anyway.]
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she slows her approach, hanging a few feet back to observe. at least he isn't dead. ]
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Given the general silence around him and the way he seems to be listening carefully for...something, he does end up hearing her approach, though he doesn't turn to check.]
«That you, Ada?»
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but the fact that she even lets herself try to get accustomed to it... that's telling, isn't it? ]
Yeah. What are you doing?
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«There’s a boar. Tiny, baby one. Think it got lost. He—or she?—’s scared shitless right now, but I can’t leave him out here all alone. It's not safe.»
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It can't be far from its parents. [ it's a shame she doesn't have 2B's animal befriending abilities, and her lack in animal interaction doesn't really help. sure, she rode boars around a lot, but she had access to feed and they weren't exactly small. ] I don't have anything to lure it out with.
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«I haven’t passed any, heard any. Didn’t see any adults up to the horizon all around, even ignoring all the trees. Maybe they came through here before, but it wasn’t recently. It can’t have been.»
[There’s another pause as he considers what’d work best for a lure. Obviously his hands would be far too intrusive and foreign to the little piglet to be anything by terrifying. So if a lure is what’s needed, then...]
«There are some of those berry bushes. That they like eating from. To the. Shit. South?» [He sends a brief flicker of an image, the path he means from where they are, grimacing slightly at the side effects.] «If you could get some for me, I’d be real grateful.»
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a few minutes later, there's another image sent over: a handful of berries cupped in her palm, metal and wiring peeking out from a few scratches on her arm. ]
Found them. Is it still hiding?
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[Though he doesn't say the words verbally,
his appreciation for her help drifts across with his reply. He really couldn't do this without her.]
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[ doesn't that sound familiar?
it takes less time for her to return to him, kicking up a minor breeze before slowing her steps again and crouching next to him. a few berries are placed just outside of the bush's shade in hopes of luring the piglet out.
there's silence for a moment and then the shuffling returns, a brief glimpse of a tiny snout peeking out from beneath the bush. ]
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Hey there, little guy. [Quietly, just above a whisper.] You hungry there, pal?
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Looks like you made a friend.
[ it's said just as quietly, something in her expression softening. meanwhile, the boar has finished the berries, nudging bucky's hand with its snout as if to look for more. ]
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We’ve made one, Ada. You helped too.
[As the boar grow more curious, berries devoured, he gently curves his hand around to lightly pet the side of its neck, trying to maintain a sense of concern without frightening the little creature away.]
You still hungry? Do you want more?
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[ he's the one who found the piglet in the first place, after all. it still seems hungry so she places the rest of the berries in front of it, movements slow and careful. it's strange to be so close to something so small and fragile; the animals back on her earth were easily twice her size, it's still jarring to see one so young.
its pulse is steady and it seems to be warming up to bucky fairly quickly, having not moved since bucky started petting it. ]
Are you gonna keep it?
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You did plenty though. If I’d gone to get the berries, he would’ve run, no doubt. Probably gotten even more lost. This way, we can bring him back, see?
[And it definitely is a “we”.]
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[ she notices the "we" but doesn't comment on it aside from breathing an amused huff, a smile threatening to pull at the corner of her mouth. ]
Are you trying to say I wouldn't be able to keep him from running?
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And of course not. [He chuckles, the light reaching his eyes briefly again.] I didn’t want to make you wait on me though. Not when you’d come to find me. [He gives her a brief look then, the light still lingering. A moment passes before he glances back to the pig who’s grown comfortable enough with their presence to settled down on his haunches.]
Y’wanna have a turn? [Petting, obviously.]
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[ the waiting, she means. she's not exactly in a hurry for much of anything these days, and learning to have patience isn't difficult when you've already lost everything.
but there's something about that light in his eyes, bright as the stars they watched together on her first night on the island and just as warm, that makes her pause. she starts to see a little now why 9S had ended up with jude the way he did.
instead of answering, she lowers a hand to the piglet, letting it take a moment to sniff at it before she lightly strokes down his snout once with a finger. ]
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It steadies hearts, opens doors.
The graceful stroke of her finger earns a curious snort from the piglet, snuffling and bumping into her hand clumsily as it tries to understand what the single stroke means. Bucky regards the instance, the fumble and curiosity, and feels a sudden fondness for the both of these darling existences interacting in front of him, very real and very alive.]
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but it's that fumble and the curiosity that sparks a flicker of familiarity. she'd seen it before, groups of machine children gathered around pascal and later, even around her, their cries of "big sis" echoing around the forest as they stumbled over their eagerness to play and learn. it feels like it's been ages since then, since she'd deleted pascal's memories of them. but she still remembers, and likely will never forget.
she'd paused in her ministrations and the piglet protests by bumping his snout against her hand again, this time with more purpose. she breathes another amused huff, scratching along his neck instead. ]
Seems like you've spoiled him for attention.
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I have that problem, I guess. Always wanna make sure everyone feels like they’re important. Because they are. [Even you, Ada.]
There are worse traits to have though. Especially when this one gets us such a cute pig for a friend.
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always wanna make sure everyone feels like they’re important. she wonders who will make sure he feels important too. ]
It's not bad. [ her thumbs run back and forth along the piglet's snout, watching the way it twitches beneath her touch, the way his ears flick to the side. ] Feeling important is a good thing.
[ she thinks, anyway. ]
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(What does she see? What does she feel?)]
Yeah. I think so too. [Idly.
He joins her on the ground, arms crossed as he leans on his arm in their direction, though whether to be nearer to her or the baby boar, he isn’t sure. After a moment's pause he continues,]
Have you ever felt that way before? Like you’re doing something that matters.
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she supposes in the end it doesn't really matter. not when she's here, sitting in the forest with bucky, petting a baby boar like it's something they've always done. like it's something normal people do all the time, even if neither of them are normal. ]
... I guess I did. [ doing something that matters. purpose, duty. they're not that different. even if they were expendable, only used for combat data to be implemented in future models, at the very least they had a purpose. ] I knew I was fighting for something.
[ even if it was a lie. ]
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Not what you wanted?
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No, [ she says eventually, fingers going back to running over the piglet's head, past his ears and along his back. ] It wasn't. Not that it matters anymore.
[ yorha is gone. they have nothing left to return to. ending up on this world was likely the best alternative they've been given. ]
What about you?
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When she asks, he gives a soft huff, ready to answer easily, but
his mind blanks. He isn’t sure what he's supposed to say, even as instantaneously as the gut reaction to answer had come. He tries to wonder why, but instead feels a mind-numbing nothingness, not even sure of if he’s confused himself or if he’s forgotten something. Either way, it doesn’t feel particularly important. Probably just his poor sleep catching up with him.
(Unknown to him, the reality lays hidden from his consciousness, memories seeded deep in his brain of one Steve Rogers that had been his best friend entirely inaccessible to his conscious thought. Were it still within his grasp, it would be what had driven him for many years, but without memory of the importance of Steve, much of his past seems quite meaningless.)
After a moment, he closes his mouth and hums, soft self-reprimand of the oddness his exhaustion seems to have brought on before he shakes his head to reply properly.]
Can’t say that I have. Not beyond what I had to do to get by. I think I was mostly only around to make other people feel that way.
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... Always want to make sure everyone feels like they’re important, huh.
[ again, she finds herself wondering who will be there to make him feel like he's important. she's certainly seen him doing a lot of that, even in the short amount of time she's known him; he insists she's more than what she is, he gave her a name. it's more than she can say anyone else has done for her.
apparently, piglets aren't exempt from that either. ]
You don't have to. You're not responsible for making people feel that.
[ she wonders if he spends the same amount of time thinking about himself as much as he would for others. she wonders about the difficulties of that, of the burdens he must carry. ]